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Buying with a partner - advice needed please

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  • Buying with a partner - advice needed please

    Hi all, I?m new on here. 35 year old female, owned my own bungalow for 9 years (renovated myself). I live in a suburb I?ve lived my entire life, good social circle, parents close by, - you get the picture.

    So I?m not sure if this is house or realtionship advice! I met a chap in February , he lives with his parents, love him very much. He has a decent sized deposit saved for a while but hasn?t bought a property yet we both see a future together and want to move our realtionship onto next level.

    However - he won?t move in to my place. Point blank refuses with reasons such as it?s too small and he doesn?t want the inconvenience of moving his things to mine and then again when we buy a house together.
    So his solution is for me to sell my place and we buy a house together. We currently spend on average only 1 night a week together (he?s a shift worker).

    My heart wants to go for this as I want kids, times not on my side blah blah. But my sensible head says crikey no! No one risks that without living together first. Plus I love where I live- apart from wanting to live with him I have NO reason to move. He lives about 40 mins commute from his work whereas my house is 15 mins from his work.

    He won?t rent with me either.
    So my question is... would you or has anyone bought a house with someone they have never lived with?


  • #2
    Re: Buying with a partner - advice needed please

    This sounds like a question for Graham Norton's show. The very fact that you've felt compelled to ask the question shows something isn't right. However, TALK to this person. You'd like to raise a family with him, so a 30 minute conversation needs to be had.


    • #3
      Re: Buying with a partner - advice needed please

      Hi Pebbles,

      Sounds like exciting yet stressful times for you.

      We are estate agents deal with selling and letting property, sadly we are often called in when relationships go wrong.

      Without sounding like you parent i would suggest living together for at least 6 months, where you share all the bills. It makes sense to move into yours as he is with parents.

      Within the 6 months you will know if you really are compatible. If after that time its working, look at marketing you property and buying together (be sure to protect your part of the deposit in % on ?) Be nice to start a new life in a new home together
      Jacks and Jones Estate Agents